Aging: Is it Really All About Loss?

Reading Philip Roth's latest book, Exit Ghost (please see post below) has inspired me to think about the issue of aging and what it means. Most of us who age associate the process with loss in one way or another. The loss could be physical, mental or both.

As our bodies age, we change, and often, we try to recapture what was once ours in a different time, space and moment. Our skin might have been tighter, our hair thicker, ( or there may have been more of it), our sexual prowess more powerful and intense, our memories better. The process of aging means that we experience a series of often unwelcome losses. Some of us are unable to accept these losses, and we use every means available to us to resemble that person who we once were and recapture what once was. It can mean obtaining something completely artifical such as cosmetic surgery, to tighten our muscles, lift our breasts or make our stomach firmer. Others use 'helpers' like Viagra, or even herbal remedies. What about that man or woman who experiences mid-life crisis and has the sudden need to buy a red porches or find a girlfriend/boyfriend half his/her age? Are these the band aids that are necessary to allow us to feel better in one form or another, to recapture or capture, as the case may be, what once was or can be? And of course there are the hair dyes, cosmetics and numerous other products that speak to our younger self in one way or another. Are we seeing ourselves now as impostors, as we age and we feel aches and pains?

I invite you, the reader, to think of aging as a form of gains as well. Is it not the case that with experience comes wisdom, serenity and peace of mind? How many of us want to go back to the time when we were in our twenties or even thirties and have to figure out what life means, what we want to do with ourselves, or how to manage a ourselves?

As I told you in the post below, Philip Roth is a hero to me. He has changed my life, and taught me to look honestly at myself, from the inside out, in ways that I may not have considered in the past. By confronting our issues face on, is it not possible to accept who we are for this moment and live the best life that is possible for today? And of course, as Roth himself will continually demonstrate, good humor, no matter what the age is a true gift!

In spite of all the losses, I accept who I am at this moment. Yes, I do buy hair dye and cosmetics and face creams (see the post below), and of course, the ultimate, a beautiful handbag, which makes a woman feel like a million dollars. And of course, if I could, I would change a few events that have transpired in my life, and wish for a different outcome. But at the end of the day, when the make-up comes off, the handbag goes to the shelf and the creams dissolve, I am just left with me, a person who I really do like today.

Thank you for your minds.