What I Have Learned In Blogsville That I Did Not Want To Know
Writing a blog, and reading those of so many others has been a fascinating journey. For the most part, the experience has been positive, as it has allowed me to uncover and discover so much about myself through writing, and I have met some truly wonderful individuals in the process. As many of you know, since I do not live in a Jewish neighborhood, and blogging has allowed me to connect with others Jews, in a virtual world filled with never-ending possibilities. Although the experience has been mainly positive, there has been something learned that I would have rather not known.
My entire life, until maybe about ten years ago, when I was hand selected to represent an Orthodox Jewish child who had been given a venereal disease by her father, it was always my understanding (or shall I say misunderstanding) that the most pious, those who were most observing of the Commandments and Prohibitions were the most righteous. What does it mean to be a righteous individual? To be moral, to be good, to be kind, to do what is right, to be honest, truthful and trusting, and to be a good soul. As I discovered ten years ago, and what has been reinforced for me here in blogsville is that this conclusion is not necessarily true. Thankfully, at least, there are only a handful of bad actors and actresses in the group, but what I have discovered is that among my own people, those who claim to be pious are in reality leading a double life. What do I mean by this? These individuals are cruel, mean, abusive, speak poorly to others, use words here that would not dare be uttered within their community, nor to others, and moreover, these men and women are unfaithful and cheat on their spouses. In addition to the emotional abuse, some spouses and children are physically abused as well. Moreover, there is a bully mentality among so many, the conclusion being that if you are made to feel terrible, you may change. Consequently, many feel it necessary to come here and berate others simply because they do not follow the Commandments as they see fit. This conduct is a form of bullism by proxy.
Which brings me to my question: Are these individuals really so righteous? Does God look upon them with favor, dignity, and strength, or as those with weakness? For example, there was a kind religious woman who claimed to be bi-sexual. She was harassed, shunned, bullied and made fun of, and was spoken to in the most unpleasant of terms, all because these individuals did not approve of her life-style. Who is the more righteous? The one who is open and honest, although maybe different, but has a kind heart and good soul, or the one who is mean, nasty and abusive? I ask this question because to me, being a good Jew means being a good person, no matter what else may be involved. Are these individuals who cheat, lie, bully, demean, curse, harass, truly good people? Not in my book. Frankly, I think they are shameful individuals, who live within a realm of negativity and criticism, and the only way to make themselves feel big is by putting other people down, whatever the cost.
Many of you claim that you have not even met Jews before. After all, we are only 14 million left in this world. Frankly, I think that the fighting that occurs among us is even worse, in some ways, then the anti-semiticism and hatred that others have towards us, since we should know better. What can be worse than a Jew turning against another Jew? In my opinion, this is a true and potentially unforgivable sin. That being said, it is the case that most of my people are good, intelligent, hard working, and kind souls, as you can see from the many posts and comments I receive on my blog. This post is, to some extent, an attempt to clarify my own opinions on this most difficult of subjects, and to show those who read this blog, that each and every group has a few bad apples, but that we should not be judged nor condemned as a whole.
This writing of this post is for all of you, who are a little different, maybe not so observant, committed, or have chosen another path, to know that you are respected and loved for who you are. Live and let live! It is also for those of you who are religious and righteous to know that you, are the examples, the pillars of our community, whose words, thoughts and deeds are cherished and appreciated by us all as well. If we cannot learn to respect one another, how can be expect the world to respect us as well?
On a more serious note, all my prayers are with Gilad Shalit, the captured Israeli soldier, and his family. May it be, that you are safe, and that your return to your family is speedy and without incident.
Thank you for your minds.
My entire life, until maybe about ten years ago, when I was hand selected to represent an Orthodox Jewish child who had been given a venereal disease by her father, it was always my understanding (or shall I say misunderstanding) that the most pious, those who were most observing of the Commandments and Prohibitions were the most righteous. What does it mean to be a righteous individual? To be moral, to be good, to be kind, to do what is right, to be honest, truthful and trusting, and to be a good soul. As I discovered ten years ago, and what has been reinforced for me here in blogsville is that this conclusion is not necessarily true. Thankfully, at least, there are only a handful of bad actors and actresses in the group, but what I have discovered is that among my own people, those who claim to be pious are in reality leading a double life. What do I mean by this? These individuals are cruel, mean, abusive, speak poorly to others, use words here that would not dare be uttered within their community, nor to others, and moreover, these men and women are unfaithful and cheat on their spouses. In addition to the emotional abuse, some spouses and children are physically abused as well. Moreover, there is a bully mentality among so many, the conclusion being that if you are made to feel terrible, you may change. Consequently, many feel it necessary to come here and berate others simply because they do not follow the Commandments as they see fit. This conduct is a form of bullism by proxy.
Which brings me to my question: Are these individuals really so righteous? Does God look upon them with favor, dignity, and strength, or as those with weakness? For example, there was a kind religious woman who claimed to be bi-sexual. She was harassed, shunned, bullied and made fun of, and was spoken to in the most unpleasant of terms, all because these individuals did not approve of her life-style. Who is the more righteous? The one who is open and honest, although maybe different, but has a kind heart and good soul, or the one who is mean, nasty and abusive? I ask this question because to me, being a good Jew means being a good person, no matter what else may be involved. Are these individuals who cheat, lie, bully, demean, curse, harass, truly good people? Not in my book. Frankly, I think they are shameful individuals, who live within a realm of negativity and criticism, and the only way to make themselves feel big is by putting other people down, whatever the cost.
Many of you claim that you have not even met Jews before. After all, we are only 14 million left in this world. Frankly, I think that the fighting that occurs among us is even worse, in some ways, then the anti-semiticism and hatred that others have towards us, since we should know better. What can be worse than a Jew turning against another Jew? In my opinion, this is a true and potentially unforgivable sin. That being said, it is the case that most of my people are good, intelligent, hard working, and kind souls, as you can see from the many posts and comments I receive on my blog. This post is, to some extent, an attempt to clarify my own opinions on this most difficult of subjects, and to show those who read this blog, that each and every group has a few bad apples, but that we should not be judged nor condemned as a whole.
This writing of this post is for all of you, who are a little different, maybe not so observant, committed, or have chosen another path, to know that you are respected and loved for who you are. Live and let live! It is also for those of you who are religious and righteous to know that you, are the examples, the pillars of our community, whose words, thoughts and deeds are cherished and appreciated by us all as well. If we cannot learn to respect one another, how can be expect the world to respect us as well?
On a more serious note, all my prayers are with Gilad Shalit, the captured Israeli soldier, and his family. May it be, that you are safe, and that your return to your family is speedy and without incident.
Thank you for your minds.
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