Love In a Time of Joy and Sadness
Each and every one of us desires, even craves love to some extent or another. There is something quite satisfying by being able to give of ourselves, freely, in a manner that brings joy to ourselves as well as to others. And of course, 'love without strings,' i.e. the expectation that we give freely without reference or expectation of receiving is the best type of love possible.
Frankly, I consider myself a warm, loving person, and like to light up a person's face by my words and/or deeds or best of all with a smile. It is such a magical illuminating experience to know that your presence has a positive impact on someone else. What a great, magnificant gift to oneself and to others.
There are times, however, that no matter how loving one can be, there is still a sense of sadness, loss or difficulty that touches our lives in some way or another, making us vulnerable in some way or another. Nevertheless, does this mean that we should stop loving, or living as we do?
As I have aged, I realize that love, like pain and suffering are a natural part of living. That being said, I do not think it is worthwhile spending time or spinning wheels to show love to someone who is not deserving of it. And there are many such people in this world, even those whom we have tried to show love, kindness and tenderness, but have felt as if our efforts have gone unrecognized. For me, what this means, more than anything else, is that we, as individuals, must learn to accept each person with his/her own limitations, without expectation. Whether we desire to continue to be a loving and giving person is entirely our own choice and decision.
What is my convoluted message here? That we should continue to be loving, kind and good human beings, to allow us to feel completed and whole in some way or another. Life goes on, sadness takes place, a sense of loss may occur, but to loose ourselves in an attempt to make someone else act in a certain way, or experience a particular result, is to short-change ourselves ultimately.
Thank you for your minds.
Frankly, I consider myself a warm, loving person, and like to light up a person's face by my words and/or deeds or best of all with a smile. It is such a magical illuminating experience to know that your presence has a positive impact on someone else. What a great, magnificant gift to oneself and to others.
There are times, however, that no matter how loving one can be, there is still a sense of sadness, loss or difficulty that touches our lives in some way or another, making us vulnerable in some way or another. Nevertheless, does this mean that we should stop loving, or living as we do?
As I have aged, I realize that love, like pain and suffering are a natural part of living. That being said, I do not think it is worthwhile spending time or spinning wheels to show love to someone who is not deserving of it. And there are many such people in this world, even those whom we have tried to show love, kindness and tenderness, but have felt as if our efforts have gone unrecognized. For me, what this means, more than anything else, is that we, as individuals, must learn to accept each person with his/her own limitations, without expectation. Whether we desire to continue to be a loving and giving person is entirely our own choice and decision.
What is my convoluted message here? That we should continue to be loving, kind and good human beings, to allow us to feel completed and whole in some way or another. Life goes on, sadness takes place, a sense of loss may occur, but to loose ourselves in an attempt to make someone else act in a certain way, or experience a particular result, is to short-change ourselves ultimately.
Thank you for your minds.
7 Comments:
Reminds me of the Play titled: I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change!
Acceptance IS the answer!
Good post.
I remember that play well, Todd, and saw it in New York.
Acceptance is the answer, I agree.
But I think too, that we must decide what we are willing to accept as well. In that respect, we do have a choice.
A point of this post was that even though someone can be loving, there are times, when his/her life is affected by sadness and loss too. Nevertheless, we learn to find some peace within the cracks as well.
Good post!
Weird. I wrote a post yesterday on my blogs about love. Mostly it was about my rejection of the Christian command to love one's enemies. It doesn't mean we should hate them...that's a waste of energy. But loving someone who hates me is a waste of energy too.
WW
Hi Barbara,
I hope you find some serenity with your situation.
To love is a selfish act, and to withhold love is also a selfish act. One just feels better than the other. The term "tough love" is behavior that is in-between. It is loving and letting go of the results.... just my opinion.
WW says, "loving someone who hates me is a waste of energy too."
If I may put it in a more positive way, loving someone who does not allow me to love myself in a healthy way is a waste of energy. Moreover,is someone who chronically rejects the love you have to offer worthy of the love you have to give? Just a thought.
To me, self-worth is the most important, and anyone who acts in a way to errode at that core is not worthy of one's love in my humble opinion.
gee, how did I miss this post?? I've been thinking about this very topic all week. I've been struggling a lot with trying to understand a friend who for his own reasons has frozen me out. I've spent an exhorbitant amount of time thinking on this......
and I have decided.......
I will continue to be who I am. I will continue to share my feelings and my unconditional love to him and I will continue to remind myself that I have no power or control over his response, but his LACK of response will not impact my self-worth.
OOOOO........that sounds good on paper, but it's so difficult not to let other feelings seep in.
I guess most importantly, I am in control of how I express myself and how much I want to share......and nothing else.....
it is the unloved or the person who feels unlovely who needs our attention and care the most.....
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home