The Whispering of Ghosts: What is the Meaning of Being a Jew?
So much personal reflection and time has gone into my trying to understand what this means and how to define the meaning of being a Jew for me. It has something I had been very proud of, my hertitage, its meaning, and the struggles of my people throught-out time. My own quest was beginning to take me towards a deeper understanding of the meaning of God and the religion. As I have noted below, I am now on a path of disconnect, where I am questioning more than having meaningful answers given to me.
What is the point of lighting my candles on Friday night? What is the point of trying to comply with the commandments and prohibitions of the Torah? Many of the Jews I have met in blogsville lately have showm me a set of values filled with contradiction and intolerance, pain and suffering. On the one hand, they say they are pious, self-rigious individuals, claiming devotion to God and His people, yet shun another Jew, and make the most bigoted and insulting remarks I have heard from anyone in a long time. It makes me feel sadened and ashamed, resulting in feelings of withdrawal and isolation. Getting closer to God, from the Jewish perspective is something that seems very unattractive to me at this moment.
You see the answer is not to be a religious v. secular Jew, because as illustrated below, it is possible to be nothing as well. Believe in nothing, fight for nothing, give to no-one. I have already, as of Wednesday, asked the Chabad organization to remove me from the Daily Mitzvah and Tanya lists that I had coming to me for more than two years. Why take the message when the messangers are so unkind, rude and intolerant? It has always been my feeling that if you want someone or something to be attrative to someone else, your way of thinking and/or believing and/or living, then it is essential to set a good example. To be kind in one's words as well as one's deeds.
For now, I am going to be left with my own deep, personal thinking, about what is left. You can see the questions that are raised above, and I want to be alone and think in an attempt to sort this all out.
So ironic, in a way, how some of these Chassids, those from Boro Park, not all, as I do not classify all in to be cut from the same cloth, say they do mitzvot, try to bring the Jew closer to the religion, andin this case, there are a few who have made this Jew go further and further away.
Thank you for your minds.
What is the point of lighting my candles on Friday night? What is the point of trying to comply with the commandments and prohibitions of the Torah? Many of the Jews I have met in blogsville lately have showm me a set of values filled with contradiction and intolerance, pain and suffering. On the one hand, they say they are pious, self-rigious individuals, claiming devotion to God and His people, yet shun another Jew, and make the most bigoted and insulting remarks I have heard from anyone in a long time. It makes me feel sadened and ashamed, resulting in feelings of withdrawal and isolation. Getting closer to God, from the Jewish perspective is something that seems very unattractive to me at this moment.
You see the answer is not to be a religious v. secular Jew, because as illustrated below, it is possible to be nothing as well. Believe in nothing, fight for nothing, give to no-one. I have already, as of Wednesday, asked the Chabad organization to remove me from the Daily Mitzvah and Tanya lists that I had coming to me for more than two years. Why take the message when the messangers are so unkind, rude and intolerant? It has always been my feeling that if you want someone or something to be attrative to someone else, your way of thinking and/or believing and/or living, then it is essential to set a good example. To be kind in one's words as well as one's deeds.
For now, I am going to be left with my own deep, personal thinking, about what is left. You can see the questions that are raised above, and I want to be alone and think in an attempt to sort this all out.
So ironic, in a way, how some of these Chassids, those from Boro Park, not all, as I do not classify all in to be cut from the same cloth, say they do mitzvot, try to bring the Jew closer to the religion, andin this case, there are a few who have made this Jew go further and further away.
Thank you for your minds.
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