Anonymity and Speaking Freely
In an attempt towards solidarity and unity, and to stay away from politics and religion, for a day, I thought I would post on something totally different.
Has anyone noticed how anonymity correlates to some extent with our ability to speak freely, which can, at times results in rudenss in certain contexts? Think about it. People who we do not even know feel justified, almost entitled to flip one another off, yell, scream, say the meanest things when driving inside of their cars when their indentity is unknown. It is almost as if when we are anonymous, we feel we can take that extra liberty to be unkind towards others. Who among us does not long for that fleeting moment when we caan flip someone off, yell, scream, say the f word and hide behind the mask of being anonymous? It is as if we have received a license to speak our minds! Here is another example: the other day, someone called our home, mistakenly, and when I answered, I hung up. Well, I have that call 69 feature, and dialed back, and asked, 'did you just telephone my home?' Instead of saying, 'yes' or 'no', the individual hung up on me!
When thinking about the creation of this blog, part of what allows me to speak so freely, I must admit, is that to many, I am truly unknown. This point somewhat played itself out yesterday in two contexts. One I had in blogsbille and another with someone whom I had known had read my blog and commented. In one situation, a woman reacted in when I posted on a woman's blog, and I admit to being a bit sarcastic. (I'll own up to my part and I acknowledged it.) Conseqquently, the woman reacted in an insulting manner, and posted something telling me what she thought and ended by saying I could stick it you know where. I mean, she displayed her name, even photograph, but being anonymous gave her license to be unkind towards me. Another example was a friend of mine had read my blog and commented. In some ways, I felt a bit unconfortable, thinking, does this person really know that this is how I feel about certain things? Sometimes, when we are face to face with someone we know, albeit on line on in person, most of us do not take the liberities with others as we do when they are completely anonymous.
I suppose all of us long for that moment on the freeway where we can be uncensored, and flippant, and flip someone off we do not know. It gives us release, after all, to let off steam in an otherwise hostile world. I would be lying if I said that I did not carry these impulses, but I do try to treat others with civility and respect even if I do not know them, mainly because to be mean and nasty, is not good for me in the long run.
Have you had these experiences as well?
Thank you for your minds.
Has anyone noticed how anonymity correlates to some extent with our ability to speak freely, which can, at times results in rudenss in certain contexts? Think about it. People who we do not even know feel justified, almost entitled to flip one another off, yell, scream, say the meanest things when driving inside of their cars when their indentity is unknown. It is almost as if when we are anonymous, we feel we can take that extra liberty to be unkind towards others. Who among us does not long for that fleeting moment when we caan flip someone off, yell, scream, say the f word and hide behind the mask of being anonymous? It is as if we have received a license to speak our minds! Here is another example: the other day, someone called our home, mistakenly, and when I answered, I hung up. Well, I have that call 69 feature, and dialed back, and asked, 'did you just telephone my home?' Instead of saying, 'yes' or 'no', the individual hung up on me!
When thinking about the creation of this blog, part of what allows me to speak so freely, I must admit, is that to many, I am truly unknown. This point somewhat played itself out yesterday in two contexts. One I had in blogsbille and another with someone whom I had known had read my blog and commented. In one situation, a woman reacted in when I posted on a woman's blog, and I admit to being a bit sarcastic. (I'll own up to my part and I acknowledged it.) Conseqquently, the woman reacted in an insulting manner, and posted something telling me what she thought and ended by saying I could stick it you know where. I mean, she displayed her name, even photograph, but being anonymous gave her license to be unkind towards me. Another example was a friend of mine had read my blog and commented. In some ways, I felt a bit unconfortable, thinking, does this person really know that this is how I feel about certain things? Sometimes, when we are face to face with someone we know, albeit on line on in person, most of us do not take the liberities with others as we do when they are completely anonymous.
I suppose all of us long for that moment on the freeway where we can be uncensored, and flippant, and flip someone off we do not know. It gives us release, after all, to let off steam in an otherwise hostile world. I would be lying if I said that I did not carry these impulses, but I do try to treat others with civility and respect even if I do not know them, mainly because to be mean and nasty, is not good for me in the long run.
Have you had these experiences as well?
Thank you for your minds.
8 Comments:
Good topic! When I was a kid, my dad used to say that when people get in their cars, they suddenly think they are driving army tanks, ready to aim, fire and kill the driver who ticks them off...I think the blog offers great opportunity for that attitude as well.
I think it comes dowm to a restraint/control and maturity issue ( which I don't claim to have a hold on myself!) and we (I!) need to remember the life giving or destructive power of words.
Thanks for your most interesting and well thought out topics. I like hanging out here!
Thank you, Lori!
For me, words can be the most powerful of all weapons. As discussed in a topic below, staying silent is often more powerful than speaking one's mind.
Please come back!
b
I will say the same thing, regardless of my status as known or anonymous. If someone does not like the answers I give, then maybe they should not ask scary questions.
I think this is true for most people. If you are rude in real life, you are also rude online. If you are intolerant of other people's thoughts or ideas in real life, you are the same way online.
All that being anonymous does is amplify your thoughts, and make you more likely to say what you really feel.
Great topic :)
First of all, putting our identity with what we say makes us accountable to those very words. Sometimes I do not even know if I agree with myself (I am still young, learning, etc) and so the thought of "hey, why don't I post this anonymously?" (in a blog for eg.) is a tempting thought to put into action. I haven't done it yet, and hopefully I don't ever resort to seperating myself from what I think (ie - I hope that I can be someone who can stand by what they say with integrity).
So perhaps the temptation to flip someone off on the highway or yell into the phone at the operator anonymously(I'm an operator--I get this a lot!!) comes from our lack of motivation to stand beside/with who we truly are and the opinions we hold. At my job there are people who phone to complain about the company I work for...up one side of the issue and back down the other; however, the instant I say "would you like me to put you through to someone who can properly document your complaint?" the people back down, calm down, refrain and apologize. I'm not sure that their opinion of the company has changed, simply their desire to be recognized for that opinion.
All those words to say, I agree :)
And again, fascinating topic!
Hi Beautiful B,
My sister regularly reads my blog - and I too write only things I'd talk about in person. Of course she mentioned that I talk about fragrances too much. When I write something, I have more time to think about it and also edit my words where as if they are spokem, you don't have that liberty.
Thanks for a really great blog! I do not like anonymity, especially online. It give licence to be someone you are not. Accountability is important to me. I'm a philosopher; when I make a bad argument or commit an ad hominem attack, I expect and desire to be called for it. If I post anonymously, even if I am called on it, it may not be taken as seriously by me, since my name was never attached to it in the first place.
I also dislike anonymous comments on blogs. Typically speaking, people who comment anonymously are trolls; they have nothing of value to say. I like to engage in discussion, debate and to sharpen my thinking skills, but I like to do it in a civilized fashion, with little to no name calling. Thats the only way proper dialogue can be done.
On the issue of blog topics there are definately things I would like to talk abut on my blog, but cannot, for fear of my readership reacting in a negative way (especially when my readership involves my parents and young siblings). Yet, I'm still not afraid to talk about things that may be offensive; not to long ago I wrote a post on the usefulness of the female orgasm. My mother was slightly perterbed, but alas... thats her problem, not mine!
Peter,
Yes, I see anonymity is completely not an issue in blogsville. You have had the wonderful courage to use your own name!
Thank you for your great comments and insight. I'll have a look at your blog today as well.
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