A Very Scary Halloween

First of all, Happy Halloween to one and all. May you all enjoy the costumes, the candy and the colorful decorations that have been part of this enjoyable holiday for so many years.

As a child, Halloween was a time of fun, and fear, with the additional admonition that the fun would stay (in the form of gathering candy door to door and doning an obscure or adorable personality that came in the form of some unfulfilled fantasy) and the fear would disappear after October 31st ended. I can remember purchasing and making costumes from witches, ghosts, cocktail waitresses, to Napoleon, the Elephant Man, and Al Capone (hence, my secret desires to be of the male gender.)

This Halloween is much scarier for me, on a personal level, with all of the worries and preoccupations centered around my daughter being ill, and on a global level, as I watch the state of our country slide down a slippery slope, and Israel be threatened more and more by its neighbors, specifically Iran. Tragedy has loomed large this year on both fronts, with the recent hurricanes that have flooded and ruined many places in our country, the devastating earthquake in Pakistan and India, and the loss of more than 2,000 American lives abroad in Iraq (and lives of non-Americans as well.) When we factor into this equastion the price of gas, the aborted attempts to name a competent Justice for the Supreme Court, and the inditement and investigations of major key White House officials, it seems as if the state of our nation, and my personal state of being are in a total state of disarray. At times, I feel as if I am watching from a distance, standing in front of my own dead body.

What does this all mean? As you may know, I am someone who sees the glass half full, and wants to keep filling it up more and more, even in times of a nasty drought. Many of you have been so very kind and gracious this week with your gentle words and posts. Others have send emails, ecards, made telephone calls, with the words singing so loudly, "I care" and do not give up hope. These gestures, standing alone, make me grateful, and give me hope, that no matter what happens around me, there is something good, kind, nurturing and loving to balance it out on a daily basis, especially if we open our eyes and ears to the messages. As a side-note, I have been writing daily, and my experiences may be turned into a book of sorts, if I am lucky.

Thank you all for your kindness, and words encouraging me to continue to write, which has served as a dosage of release and promise of hope for this day as it exists this very moment.

Thank you for your minds.

For Fun and Entertainment Only

As many of you can see from below, Woman on the verge of Thinking has been having a rather difficult and painful week. Consequently, I am am unable to come up with any good thoughts for now.

I found this classic Personality Test. Actually, it is fairly accurate, if you would like to have a try:
http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes1.htm

Please post your personality type as well. Mine is a INFJ.

As a side note, I think my blog humor 'soul-mate' has been found. At first glance, you may be puzzled, but something that is not revealed about me is that I have a very dark, sick sense of humor. For a look at a man who taught me the difference between jokes and humor (the former not really my cup of tea), please see: http://hellskitchennyc.blogspot.com/ who, I bet does not know it, but is one of many who has kept smiles on my face this week.

Thank you for your minds.

Do You Ever Ask Why Me?

Surely many of you, when thrust inside of a situation that is difficult or painful might ask the question, 'why me?' Some of us, myself included, learn to step backwards, often getting sideswiped in the process, to see if there is anything that we could have, would have or should have done differently to prevent something from happening the way it did. If we only had one of those all powerful magic wands, imagine how it would all turn out! Or, as the old song from the Rolling Stones, goes, Time is on My Side.

Trying to make sense of everything that has been happening this year, the death of my father, the illness of my daughter, has left me in a fragile and exposed state. No matter what efforts or attempts we employ to make sense of these events in our lives, if we allow our eyes to remain open and our ears to hear, we can learn something. Even if the lesson is not to our liking, or speaksof learning to live with un-resolved issues, these are messages to hear. It may not be what we like, but nevertheless, we learn. There may be a need to reach out to others, just to hear the words, 'we care', rather than to retell the story, open up the wounds, make the pain grow bigger and bigger. I know for me, at this moment in time, I want people to be there for me, but it is too difficult to talk, to answer questions or speak about what is happening around me.

This remarkable book by Joan Didion, The Year of Magical Thinking, begins with a quote: "Life changes fast. Life changes in the instant. You sit down to dinner and life as you know it ends."
What a powerful message exists in these words, and reading this book, about her own personal issues of death and loss, has made me know that isolation is not the answer at all. Everything unfolds in its own time. Didion tackled these questions as she took stock of many important moments that lead to the illness of her daughter and the death of her husband, and found some personal, and often painful resolution. Nevertheless, this is a remarkable and honest book about love, loss, illness and grief.

Here is what I know, when I ask, why me? I have no power to change the direction nor course of events as I want them to be. We may think that we have been lucky or unlucky during our lives, but in truth, luck has very little to do with life. All I can do is my part, whether that is to cry in a moment, go visit someone, bring items, show love and support, or go to the cemetery. Bad things happen to everyone, at any given time, regardless of luck in life. Self-pity is not helpful for any length of time. Actually, it makes me feel as if I am entitled to something, when in reality, that is simply not the case at all. How we deal with our misfortunes, and what we learn from them, may or may not make our lives better, richer or fuller. But they will in some way or another effect us and who we are as well as who we become. For me, writing does help sort out the emotions as I see them blazing on the screen in black and white. And the support from those who read my blog means so very much to me, an unexpected bonus, for which I am most greatful.

Thank you for your minds.

Abortion & the Parental Notification Measure: The Legislature and the Amendment Process

Sitting here for these past few days, dealing with my daughter, and all of the emotions surrounding her, I have been reading an excellent book The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion. She explores what a year in her life was like when her daughter went into septic shock and went into an induced coma, and within hours of this event, her husband died suddenly from a heart attack while they were eating dinner. A powerful book, about life, death, illness and memory, it made me realize that one still must have an attitude of gratitude about life. Consequently, I have lifted myself off that nagging pity pot, and decided to post about one of my favorite subjects, our government and the regulation of privacy.

As many who live in California know, there is a Proposition on this November's Special Election Ballot, Number 73, which would require a minor's parent's to be notified in the event that a girl seeks to have an abortion. The Amendment does not require parental consent, exclusively notification. On its face, it appears to be worthy and protective of those girls who are minors and find themselves pregnant. The California's Constitution protects a minor's right to medical access and privacy better than federal law does, and as such, Prop. 73 amends the state Constitution substituting the words unborn child for a fetus.

What is the true motive and purpose behind this proposition? Is it to help teenage girls and their families in the event that an unwanted pregnancy results, or is it a behind the scene way of chisseling away at Roe v. Wade? One would hope that if a daughter became pregnant, the channels of communication within the home would be such that she would tell her parent's what transpired. But what about those who do not? What does it mean in terms of their dynamics the role of the government and whether this matter should be decided by the legislature or by proposition avotersvoter's of a particular state? If the parent's were notified and they wanted the girl to keep the baby, what about the risk of harm to her if she goes and obtains a botched up abortion? What if the parents are divorced should one or both parents be notified? What if the girl goes against her parent's wishes and is not allowed to return home? Is it not her body? Should it not be the case that communication between parents and their children remains open so that if this occurs, the parents would be the first ones to know? If not, what does that say about the family and their dynamics?

On its face, I am not so much opposed to parental notification of a minor's pregnancy. What disturbs me is that this issue, is to be decided by the VOTERS in a special election, and not the legislature itself. Frankly, I am suspicious of these special elections where the voters, who more often than not have a knee jerk reaction, and do not read these amendments carefully, (myself included at times), are left to decide a job that should be left to our government.

Here is the question of the day: What is your opinon on parental notification (not consent) as it pertains to a minor's decision to get an abortion? What are the pros and cons you see surfacing? Do you believe that this issue should be decided by the voters themselves or the legislature, and why?

I expect much debate on this issue, and would bet that those who do not regularly post, will surface, jump in and have passionate opinons. Please feel free.

Thank you for your minds.

Why The Jews? From BFC's Son

My mother asked me to comment on a post she wrote awhile back on the Jews. She has been preoccupied lately with my sister and asked me to post something so here it is.

I remember you (and some people on the blog) wanted to know a little more about my theory on why people hate jews. Well I was bored and wrote a little summary about it. Spelling and grammar may be incorrect.

Throughout modern history, Jewish hatred has been a convenient tool for the rich, power-holding elite who wish to distort, and undermine true democracy and maintain a caste system, in order to maintain and accumulate power and wealth. Jewish hatred is, and has been convenient to the rich, land-owning, ruling class, because ordinary, un-educated people everywhere are susceptible to racist arguments. So, throughout modern history, undemocratic establishment forces often try to mobilize people's fears of particular ethnic groups, so as to distract them from the real source of inequality and oppression: the established elite itself.
So why the Jewish people? The ethnic group targeted has often been Jewish people because they are, and have always been a distinct minority in many countries, and have unique and rich history of questioning the establishment and not accepting issues on blind faith. Judaism, unlike Catholicism and other religions that were developed to keep the elite . . . well . . . elite, does not encompass a rigid hierarchical system and most importantly does not impose the idea of the infallibility of an individual. Judaism teaches that if you're not asking questions, you're not learning, and you're not growing. The entire purpose of having Rabbis is so that they can answer our questions. We even have a Seder on Passover whose entire purpose is get people (especially children) to ask questions. From a young age Jewish children are encouraged to question authority instead of accepting any issues on blind faith. From the Torah to the Talmud – Judaism is about questioning, interpreting and growing. History has proven (over and over again) that there are two things that spark revolt against the establishment – education and anger. When an oppressed people get angry or start to ask questions and interpret the motives of the established elite – the rich, powerful, land-owning minority, have a whole lot to worry about. Their lavish lives are built on a system of oppression, and any shift or change in this absolute hierarchy will cause them to lose power and wealth. Add all the pieces together, and now Jewish people, and their culture of learning, growing and questioning, become a direct threat to the established elite.
I'm a strong believer in the collective unconsciousness – and I believe that oppressed people, no matter how uneducated, have some semblance of knowledge of their oppression, and the conspiracy of the elite to try to keep them down (be it subconscious or not). I also believe that this subconscious realization of oppression and conspiracy instills some sort of latent anger and aggression in the oppressed people. So the established elite (the actual perpetrators of the conspiracy to control and oppress the people) use the Jews as a scapegoat. Jews are an easy target because they have generally been financially successful (due to historical traditions that limited Christians to not handling money) and also are a minority culture that little is known about; ohh . . . and they killed Jesus too . . . which doesn't really help their case. The oppressed people, weather or not the truly believe these falsities, have so many generations of covert anger and hatred built up, as well as so many generations of accepting the infallibility of authority (thanks Catholicism!), that they blindly accept the hatred against the Jews and commit violent acts against the Jewish people as a catharsis for so many years of oppression. Once the oppressed people purge this anger – they "mellow out" and are much easier to control for another few generations until the collective anger builds up again . . . coincidentally this also happens in conjunction with the revitalization of Jewish population from the previous genocide . . . and you can see where this story goes. The elite get exactly what they want; they take away the two largest factors that could lead to revolt against their establishment; the anger of the oppressed people and the spirit of education and democracy brought forth by the Jews. As long as the established elite keep the Jewish population low, they will not have to fear losing their authority, because too small of a minority (no matter how well educated) is still only a small minority. So why not exterminate all the Jews; well a few have tried, but take them all away and who will be the scapegoat the next time the oppressed people get angry (and trust me, they will get angry; any people lacking freedom will only temporarily accept this atrocious fate)? Should the Jews be concerned? Take a look at the distribution of wealth in our country and around the world for that matter, and the current trend towards anti-democratic legislation that ensures the rich will get richer and that the powerful will stay in power, and you tell me.


As my mom would say thank you for your minds.

Friendships: Those Between Women & Men & Women & Women & Men & Men

There was one point in my life when I believed that women and men could not develop a meaningful or satisfying friendship. It was my opinion, that if there even was an element of sexual attraction, or interest present, the power of the genitals would overcome the gentleness of the heart. Today, I do not feel that way anymore, but I do believe, that friendship between the sexes differs. As a woman, I can only talk from my own perspective, and it is truly the case that men and women, for the most part make different types of friends. Certainly, I do have some wonderful male friends, who are up to par, if not better friends to me than women, but my generalization stands for the most part.

What is a friend, you may ask, and what do we expect from them? To me, a friend is someone who cares for you unconditionally. Someone who is there for you during the good times, the mediocre ones, and the difficult times as well. In my personal experience, it is the case that most men, not all, tend to run away from difficulties, either because of the inability or disability in being able to handle pain and be a source of true comfort. So tomatoes are not thrown at me, I do have male friends who are the most compassionate and loving people, and it is the case that 9 out of 10 of them are gay men! Do gay men make better friends then straight men? Yes, in my personal experience, although I do have one male friend who is not gay and is a beautiful friend.
My friends who are lesbians are amazing friends, but it may be the case it is so, because they are women, period. Perhaps, the reality is that I have the same expectations from my male friends as my female ones, and that is a mistake on my part.

Here are my questions of the day: Do you think it is possible for men and women to be true friends? Are men different types of friends than women? If so, how? Do you have different expectations from friends of the same sex than of the opposite sex? Would you like your male friends to be the same as your female friends? Are your female friends better friends than your male friends? Does sexual orientation factor into the definition of what constitutes a good friend, and if so, why?

These are questions that I am pondering for the moment. As many of you know, I am dealing with a very difficult situation here at home, and it has made me think along these lines, with these types of questions.

Thank you for your minds.

How Do You Handle Pain and Suffering & What Do you Learn From It?

As many can see from the posts below, this has been a particularly difficult week for myself and my family. Who among us has not experienced personal pain, suffering or even loss of one form or another. Most of us, no matter how weak we may seem to be, are able to rise to the occasion and have the strength to go on and live our lives, even if it means some type of adjustment, in our attitude or behavior, in one form or another is necessary.

For me, when I am at a personal low, I surround myself with pictures, images and books about the Holocaust. Many, including my own husband, cannot understand this reaction to personal pain, that I have, but when I do so, it seems as if what I am experiencing, no matter how horrible or painful, pales by comparison. I look to those individuals who died, as well as those who have survived, to give me strength to make it through what ever is going on here. Surely, if those individuals who were brave enough to make it through such trying and miserable circumstances could pull through it, then so could I. Point of fact, my pain usually pales by comparison.

Personal pain, however, especially when a child is involved is difficult, and at times no matter how strong, resilient or brave you think you are, it is difficult to muster up the energy to stay strong and keep going.

Here is my question for the week: How do you handle pain and suffering? What comforts you, and what tools do you use to walk through the heartache to get to the other side? What lessons do you learn from such difficulties?

Thank you for your minds.

On Pain and Suffering

Although blogging is not something that is on my mind for the moment, writing is, and I have been told that it is best to put my feelings down in words, to bring some light within me. As mentioned, my daughter is ill. She suffers from a disability, requiring doctor's visits and periodic hospitalizations. Even though I am informed about her illness, have been dealing with it now for awhile, and know all the books and materials related to it, it does not diminish the pain nor suffering that a parent feels when watching her child in this type of a situation. One may hear, God does not give us more than we can handle, or this too shall pass, or you will grow and be made stronger, but somehow, these cliche phrases do not ease the burden of what feels like a personal crucifixion when watching your child suffer. How does one find meaning from such personal pain and suffering? Others may become even more cynical, and question their belief in God, and ask, why would He allow such misfortune to occur? Thankfully, this has not happened to me, and if anything, my faith, and hope must become even stronger, otherwise I will head down a dark and gloomy path towards self-destruction. There are days that feel as if I have cried away all my tears, that no reserves exist to deal with the difficulties within.

Live is not all about feeling good, having it easy, or being free from painful situations, I know.
My daughter's illness is my cross to bear, so to speak, and I will have to take each day, each moment as it presents itself and stay strong, for her, if I am unable to do so for myself.

Let pain be minimal and hope shine brightly.

Thank you for your minds.

Thoughts for My Darling Daughter

I love my daughter so very much. I hope she never thinks about anything as much as I think about her now. She has a spunk and tenacity about her, that lights up an entire room with her presence. She is someone who is firey, brave and so full of life that her eyes glissen as she speaks. Every day we have spent, especially this year, has been a great gift and such joy, that I thank God for each and every good moment we have had together.

Yesterday, I went to visit my daughter who lives on her own near the university where she studies. She appears as if she is becoming ill again, has lost some weight, with little energy and is pale. We will go to the doctor for some tests in the next few days. Meanwhile, my blogging will be at a minimum for now, as I have to take care of business at this end.

No matter how much we may want something to go away or disappear, it may be part of what we have to walk through in this life. Learning to live and accept unresolved problems, no matter how disturbing or painful they may be, is a lesson in accepting life as it is rather than the way we may want it to be.

Please keep us in your prayers and good thoughts. Every day is a great blessing, and as such each and every moment must be appreciated for the gift that it truly is. One truly does not really know what tomorrow may bring.

All good thoughts and blessings to all.

Thank you for your minds.

Is the Bush Administration on a Downward Spiral?

These past couple of weeks have been plagued with difficulties for Mr. Bush. Beginning with his slow response to Katrina, Bush now faces fire and brimstone over the role Karl Rove has played in leaking information regarding CIA agent, Valerie Plume, and a possible indictment for him as well as Dick Cheney's chief of staff, Lewis Libbey. Additionally, Mr. Cheney's role, or lack thereof, in these leaks is also being investigated. As if the investigation and possibleindictment of these two individuals is not enough, Mr. Bush is being questioned regarding his nomination of his close friend and counsel, Harriet Miers to the U.S. Supreme Court. Questions range from Ms. Miers political beliefs from members of his own party, to her lack of judicial experience as well. Not to mention, the Los Angeles Times had reported earlier this week that Ms. Miers, who has not ever been married, nor had children, will be called upon to deal with some very serious privacy issues about women, men and reproductive rights in her possible role as a Justice of the Supreme Court.

After initially promising to fire anyone who has leaked information, Bush has begun to back-pedal, and now indicates that he will fire anyone who has committed a crime. Moreover, almost two months after hurricane Katrina slammed into the Gulf Coast causing diassaster, Bush, who went on television and promised to rebuild the region quickly, seems, as reported by the Los Angeles Times today, to be in no hurry to make good on his promise.

Here are the questions for the day: Do you think Karl Rove should be indicted? Will he be indicted? What if anything would you want to know about which would possibly implicate Cheney in these matters? Do you believe that because Ms. Miers has never been married nor has had children that these factors will necessarily thwart her ability to serve on the U.S. Supreme Court and decide such privacy issues as those dealing with abortion, privacy matters, and the right to die? Do you believe that ultimately Bush will be held reposing for any of these matters?

Thank you for your minds.

Do You See the Glass Half Empty of Half Full?

Many of us surely have heard of the saying that the glass is either half empty or half full, and draw conclusions, in one form or another, about our own lives and the way in which we see them. For many, the answer we give symbolically reflects our attitude on life and how it is lived. If we see the glass as half empty, we focus on what has gone or evaporated. If we conclude that we see the glass half full, we see what remains, and what can be obtained to fill it once more.

Do our ideas, and our attitudes reflect how we can spend our time, the nature of our attitude and how we live our lives? Is it positive or negative? Do we consume our days with what we can do to make a difference in the quality of our own lives or those around us in a positive manner? Are we bored or directionless, lonely and are our days filled with negative energy and wasted moments?

For me, an attitude of gratitude has something to do with how I view the cup at any given moment. If I am grateful for what I have, I see the cup as half full, waiting to let it overflow with liquid, until it pours out. If I am in a state of self-pity, my cup not only will be half empty, but I can stand by, and even contribute, to its being emptied, drop by drop.

Do you see your cup as half empty or half full? What do you do to empty your cup or fill it up high at any given moment in time?

Thank you for your minds.

Are You Superstitious?

Everytime I sit in synagogue, memories of my very religious, and slightly eccentric grandmother surface. This year was no different, as I saw some children scramble and become restless at the idea of having to sit for so many hours in one place while participating in prayer. As I watched them, I had fond thoughts of my grandmother, and the images of us sitting upstairs separately during services loomed large in my head.

My grandmother was considered a superstitious woman. Surely most of you are acquainted with the ordinary types of superstitions such as not walking under a latter, seeing a black cat, breaking a mirror, or wearing a favorite color for good luck, or the number 13 signifying bad luck. My grandmother's beliefs ran to a different extreme including thoughts that one could not sew a garment on oneself without a piece of thread dangling from the mouth as to do so would sew up the brain. Others included not telling a bad dream before breakfast (for fear it would come true), not walking over someone as it would stunt his/her growth, and not walking in socks alone, since for Jews, the only time that type of act was engaged in was if someone was in mourning (shiva). Some of these ideas bring a smile to my face, while others make me tremble, as I think of what could happen if I engaged in any of these activities at any point in time.

EDITED:Here is the question of the day: Are you superstitious? What is a superstition? How does it differ from a religious belief? For Jews, if it is written in the Torah, it is considered halacha, or Jewish law. Can something be law and superstition at the same time? If so, tell me about some of your own superstitions and why you have them. Do you believe in them so that you will engage or refrain from the behavior so as not to bring about some misfortune?

Thank you for your minds.

Tagged by Monkey Posh...

I have tagged by Monkey Posh, dearest Jen, to name 20 random facts about myself:

1. I am left handed.

2. Coffee and water are my favorite drink.

3. I do not eat red meat.

4. I obsess on make-up, fragrances, and body lotions.

5. I am a vortatious reader.

6. If I could go back in time, I would want to meet Rashi, Leonardo DaVinci and Thomas Jefferson, Albert Einstein, Sergei Rachmaninoff and Anais Nin the most.

7. I instantly bond with dog and cat lovers.

8. I have a horrible sense of direction.

9. I am terrible at math, and still add on my fingers.

10. My grandparents (on both sides) were extremely religous.

11. I have one sibling.

12. I am passionate about classical music.

13. My favorite T.V. shows are those involving crimes, murders and forensics.

14. If I had my life to live over again, I would become a conductor of a symphony orchestra, writer or Rabbi.

15. I love goat cheese.

16. Every day, I wish we had a different President.

17. If I could live anywhere in the world, it would be Israel or NYC.

18. I love Paris.

19. I clinch my jaws.

20. Ice cream is my favorite dessert.

The Meaning of Yom Kipper

As I have aged, I find that I love the meaning of Yom Kipper. It is a time and day of judgment, intropection and forgiveness. We look at ourselves honestly, as if we are naked, with all of our flaws, sins and shortcomings on display. How do we find meaning in such a daunting task, one may ask?

For the past several years, I have stayed in synagogue the entire night of Erev Yom Kipper and the next day, until yiskor services, which is a special time to honor and mourn those close relatives who have died. This year, since my father died, it will be the first time I stay all day, including participation in this deep and often difficult service.

For some people, Yom Kipper is a painful day. We refrain from work, food, sex,and other pleasureable activities. For myself, Yom Kipper has the opposite effect, since it allows me to take an honest look at myself through a process of self-examination and brings about the promise of change. It can be a transforming day, through prayer and introspection, where new beginnings and endings have the potentionl to be formed, depending upon our own level of honesty and awareness. It is a opportunity to examine one's own defects of character, let go of them and/or turn them around and emerge with a clean slate, or a fresh start. Change, although not ever easy, does not have to be painful, and we can grow and florish from it, through open-mindness and honesty, and a williness to think and behave differently if we choose. As we ask God to inscribe us in the Book of Life, we examine ourselves, through our deeds, our thoughts and our prayers.

One area in which I am trying to improve is in the realm of fear. Sometimes, I worry so much about my children, imagining the worse or all possible case senarios, that I work myself up into a frenzy. I know that if I turn within, trust that they are in good hands, that much of this fear will subside. So for today, I am not making the twenty phone calls, with the worse of all possible images in mind. It seems that if the action can be taken first, then the good thinking will eventually follow, at least this is my sincere hope and prayer.

To all those who observe this solemn day, may you have an easy fast and may your minds and hearts open up to tranformation.

G'mar Chatima Tova. May God forgive us, and accept our prayers.

Thank you for your minds.

What Do We Mean When We Pray?

Many of us, especially when faced with hardship, difficulties or grief, often make requests for prayer. It is not uncommon, in a general way, to ask others to say prayers for us, or in the same vein, to say to someone, my thoughts and prayers are with you. Regardless, of one's religion, prayer is a common ingredient and seed of hope, strength and love for many.

But what do we mean when we pray or ask that prayer be given? During these ten days of repentence, this issue has surfaced for me, as I examine the power and peace that comes with prayer. To me, prayer is about establishing a connection to God. More often that not, however, I engage in prayer where there is difficulty, illness, or some situation that puzzles me, on the one hand, or one that makes me happy, on the other. What this means, is that I ask for prayer or find meaning in in when faced with extreme joys or sorrows. Perhaps, I am underestimating myself, to some extent, because truthfully, I pray daily in the morning and at night, to give thanks for what I have and to gain hope as well. Somehow, my most meaningful messages come from what is in between the lines.

What do you mean when you pray? What do you mean when you tell someone that you are praying for them? Is prayer a way of getting what we want, hoping that we a situation can be resolved in a way that is pleasing to us, or is it more about honoring God, and connecting? Or is it all of the above in one manner or another?

Thank you for your minds.

What is the Role of the American President?

Reading the interesting responses below, coupled with a long solitary walk, has triggered another topic of interest to me. Several months ago, I read the wonderful novel, The Plot Against America, by the brilliant American Jewish writer, Phillip Roth. In this book, Roth purposes the question, what if the anti-Semitic, isolationist, Charles Lindbergh, became President of the United States instead of Franklin D. Roosevelt? How would the country have developed, and sunk, if you will? This book is a must read, and will make many think about the state of politics in America today, and what could have been if the winds of history beared other colors.

George W. Bush is different from just about any other American president. His differences can be marked, at least to me, by his philosophy, his mannerisms, and his inability to represent and unite, the American people. What I have realized, is that the reason I find him so distasteful goes beyond the what he says. It is because he is not a President who represents the people of our country. Let us look at him. He comes from an extremely wealthy, powerful family, whose money is tied up to oil. So did many Presidents, you might claim, such as Kennedy himself. But Bush is quite different from Kennedy. As our President, Bush is most interested in being a representative of the group of people who share his philosophy and his wealth. This is most significantly demonstrated in his policies on tax cuts to the rich, the upper one percent of the population, those not representing America as a whole. Secondly, he is a president who has divided this country more than anyone else, which is most significantly reflected in the composition of his cabinet, only one Democrat, and the manner in which Republicans separate themselves from Democrats today. Watch him speak, and see that he gets right to the point, there are no social graces, or formalities about him. I could go on and on, speaking about his position on abortion, women's rights, gay rights, etc., but since I do not have the statistics before me on these issues, I will not give them much weight, nor conclude one way or the other, whether they reflect the beliefs of the majority of Americans today. Nixon, who was not a favorite of mine, did some good in my memory. He got rid of the draft, ended the war in Vietnam, and changed the gold standard. A saint, or at least an alter-boy by comparision!

As I look at Bush, I see a man who is leaving behind many or marks from his Presidency, just like every other president, although his droppings seem to be more penetrating an long-lasting from the war on Iraq, to the issue of WMD, to the Downing Street Memo (I have not forgotten), to Abu Ghrab, Donald Rumsfeld, Karl Rove, hurricane Katrina, the state of the economy and price of oil,FEMA and Mike Brown, and now the selection of Harriet Miers. These droppings, I am sure many will agree, will leave a large imprint on our country, and not necessarily one that will be positive or benefical either. The present state of our nation, time and history will bear that out in one form or another.

Here is the question of the day: to what extent, if any, should the American President represent the American people as a whole? Is it fair game for a sitting President to select people who agree with his personal and political philosophies, especially those who are supposed to be neutral, fair and impartial, and are going to represent the judiciary? Should it be the responsibility of a President to go beyond his personal beliefs and positions in making selections and implementation of ideas to reflect the majority or minority of people in this country? What legacy will George W. Bush leave behind for this country?

Have a good shabbos and a nice weekend.

Thank you for your minds.

The Nomination of Harriet Mier to the U.S. Supreme Court: Bush's Press Conference

Many of us, myself included, have been waiting with baited breathe to see who Bush would nominate to fill Justice Sandra Day O'Conner's shoes on the U.S. Supreme Court. Most believed that he would appoint a woman, but many, both Republicans and Democrats, conservatives, and others, were rather suprised to hear the name Harriet Mier. Who is Ms. Mier and why was she nominated?

Well, we know she is an attorney who practiced law in Texas, with no judicial experience. We also know that she has been Bush's White House counsel for awhile, and is considered quite loyal to him and vice-versa. As for her stand on the various issues, there is little information to gather for the moment. The White House indicates that executive priviledge will be claimed during questioning in regards to documents and/or materials that have a bearing on her time as Bush's right hand woman. How convenient is that to avoid having to answer the difficult questions!
We also know that Ms. Mier is not considered the intellectual heavy-weight of John Roberts, who many say is a very brillant jurist, able to grasp difficult legal issues.

Receiving some comments from stanch conservatives regarding whether Ms. Mier was an appropriate choice, Bush went on television on Tuesday and said, 'she shares my philosophy and that is why I picked her. I am pro-life. I can tell you that she will strickly interpret the Constitution......" To me, this was almost the same as saying, that I picked someone who will vote to over-turn Roe v. Wade. Trust me, I know who I am picking here! This type of conclusary statement is inappropraite for a sitting President to make, in my humble opinion while in office. Moreover, when Bush was pressed to answer questions about Carl Rove or the those involving the leak of the identity of a CIA agent, he said, this matter is under investigation, and I will not comment on it further. Can you imagine if Clinton had said that when the entire Lewensky affair was being investigated? He would have been accused of hiding something for certain. Somehow, this President seems to get away with more than his predecessor!

Here are the question of the day: Do you think it is appropraite for the President of the United States to go on to television and say he picked a candidate who shares his philosophy? Has chronism replaced competency in the selection of individuals to serve in the Bush administration? Must be forget Michael Brown from FEMA? What are your feelings about Ms. Mier as a pick for Justice of the U.S. Supreme Court?

Thank you for your minds.

A Glorious Beginning: 5766

Many of us can relate to hearing something over and over for years at a time, and not really understanding its message, or application to our own lives. There are times when the light-bulb illuminates brightly inside of us, and we actually hear something for the first time. The glow that surfaces reminds us that we are still teachable, and can aspire to even greater levels, higher plains of understanding. At least this has been the case for me on this Rosh Hashana.

Every year, for the past three years, I go 'synagogue hopping.' On the first day, I go to a service close by our home, but for the second day, I go to hear a very special Rosh Hashana service with Rabbi Joseph Teluskin. The venues change, and this year, the intimate setting was inside a stunning art-deco room at a historic hotel in holiday. Armed with an arsenal of old ideas, but an open mind to look at everything with a fresh, focused eye, I walked into services this year feeling particularly uplifted. As the intoxicating sound of that glorious ram's horn awakens each one of us from our sleep, I heard something this year that took on a new meaning me as the sun was setting, but the light burned brightly from the inside. Life comes to each of us as we live it from day to day, with all its joys, troubles, pitfalls and glories. For each day, there is the potential to experience joy, laughter, pain and suffering. But it is through repentance, prayer and good deeds that the severity of these decrees can be lessened or increased (at least this is how I saw it this year.) When we stay outside of ourselves, come closer to God, and our fellow men and women through prayer, repentance and just acts, we are more likely to lead a more joyful life. Does this sound familiar to many? Surely some who are familiar with the twelve step programs of AA or NA know this principles, that tell us that when we turn our lives and will over to the care and direction of God, and trust Him, that we live with a more peaceful heart and quiet mind. Furthermore, when we get outside of ourselves by doing good deeds for others, we also are able to attain a higher level of peace and serenity.

To me, this year, the great messages of Rosh Hashana are ones that I have known, but not truly practiced, all along: that if I am able to look at myself, see my part in any given situation, with honesty and an open-mind, make amends (ask for forgiveness from others, self and God), and then pray, do good for others, then I am given the ability to lead a richer, peaceful and more satisfying life each and every day. Moreover, it is entirely possible to have God be a part of my daily life, not just here for the highs or lows of life, provided that I am open to this experience.

Now, as the ten days of repentance begin, so too does an inner awakening, a new start and beginning inside the journey of self and life.

Thank you for your minds.

Reflections as the Year Comes to An End

As the apple and honey cake cooks, and I get ready physically for this solemn time of the year, the Day of Judgment, I wanted to close this year with some of my thoughts.

Mentioned below is the fact that on this day, it is Yom Hadim or the Day of Judgment where we are judged by God for all we have done during the preceeding year. It is also determined who will be inscribed in the book of life for the year to come. Most of us, myself included, do not like to be judged. There is clearly a difference between judgment and opinion, although the line may not always be so clear cut, and some feel that anytime one says his/her opinion, it is in the form of a judgment. Rather than debate the distinction, tonight it is clear that God is the judge, and I will let it rest with that. This solemn day is is also called Yom HaZicharon the Day of Memory, where we remember all we have done over the past year, and look at our part in our behavior. How are we accountable for our acts, or words or even our deeds? Did we harm anyone, including ourselves in the process? How can I become more involved in Torah, and become closer to God?

Since my blog is interactive, and at times, there have been various controversial subjects that have surfaced, I may have said something or perceived another as unpleasant and reacted in a negative way. If I have offended anyone, with my words, either intentionally or unintentionally, I would like to apologize. Furthermore, if I have gone on your blog and posted something either intentionally or untentionally that was hurtful, I apologize.

May the new year be marked by blessings to everyone, and may there be peace in Israel.

Thank you for your minds.

A New Beginning

Monday at sundown, Rosh Hashana commences. Literally meaning a New Year, the more traditional meaning ascribed to this solemn holiday is a new beginning. Each year, we are given the opportunity to begin again, start anew, with a clean slate, ever so mindful that a chapter of our lives is coming to close and we are to have a fresh start.

As I look over the last year, it can be said, that from sunset of the last Yom Kipper until the middle of June, it was a year marked with much pain, suffering, illness, and also landmarked by the death of my father. Chronic worry and fear were even present. What must also be mentioned, however, was that despite the difficulties of this year, my faith and hope were not ever lost nor shaken, and if anything, became much stronger. As such, it can truly be said that the past three months, beginning with July have been, for the most part, a true blessing with some great gifts, including the ability to appreciate and be grateful for what I have rather than what I think should be given to me.

As this year comes to a close, the inventory of the soul is unraveling, and in the process there is a dis-robing ceremony, where much is uncovered, discovered and discarded.

Since I will be cooking tomorrow, and then observing the holiday, I will be away from the blog from Monday night through Wednesday night. On Thursday, I will go to the cemetery, and make some visits to people as well, being ever mindful of my part in any given situation over this past year, and an eye present on what I can do to be a better, more valuable human being.

If you celebrate, let me wish you a sweet year, one of peace, good health and prosperity.
Otherwise, blessings to all for a good, rich week.

Shana Tova u'metukah.

Thank you for your minds.